God and Despair

 5. GOD AND DESPAIR 

Hello and welcome to my walk with God. I invite you to join me as I heal from domestic violence through the Bible. Don’t forget to read your special prayer at the end.

This time, I have been prayerfully led to Psalm Ch23 vs4 (NIV):

Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.

I’ve known the 23 Psalm back from my childhood. I learned to sing it in primary school, but it never really meant anything to me. They were just lovely descriptive words. 

Now, I know different. This Psalm, also well known from funeral services, and particularly this 4^th verse, means far more to me than when I was a child. Because I have been through my darkest valley in my life so far.

When in my situation of domestic violence, I had honestly felt that life couldn’t get any worse. All my thinking had been dark: “If God was real, I wouldn’t be hurting so badly. I wouldn’t get beaten so much. One of these days I’m going to get killed and no one, not even God, cares”.

Then one day, I was reminded of this verse. Now, I hold it close to my heart. This 4^th verse speaks of pain and despair. That we all go through dark and painful times, when all hope is despaired from. 

In this life, we will go through dark despairing times. Even Christians go through times in their lives, when they feel all hope lost, and God isn’t there. This verse speaks otherwise. We may feel at our lowest, yet God hasn’t left us. 

God is still there with us (Psalm 46:1). He was with me. I just had to remember to trust in Him. Knowing that God was (and is) still there, caring for and comforting me, really helped me to get through. I knew (and still know) that no matter what despair I may feel God will bring me through.

It’s hard to remember God is there, when on the brink of death. Yet, although I may die, I have the comfort of knowing that God will lead leading home with Him. I just have to give my life into the hands of God (which we can only do through the death of Jesus Christ), and trust that my despair will turn into joy, no matter the outcome.

I invite you to pray along with me:

Thank you, Father God, 

that You are with me 

no matter my despair. 

Thank you that I can come 

to you, through Your son, Jesus. 

Please help me to remember that 

You are with me, even in 

my deepest darkest despair. 

Remind me to trust that You 

will lead me through my despair, 

no matter what I go through. 

Thank you that if I trust in You, 

that You will comfort me. 

Thank you that when my earthly time is up, 

You will lead me home to be with You. 

Please remind me of that 

ultimate comfort when I forget. 

In the precious and blessed name

 of our Lord Jesus Christ, 

Amen.

Thank you for joining me as I heal through the Bible. Please feel empowered how you feel God comforts you. And until next time, have hope — and faith.

In God’s love, Ruby.